Your team always scores when your out of the room.
The opposing team scores when you not.
The car revving furiously in front is a Nova.
The car up your rear is also a Nova.
You wash/dry/wax your car - it rains.
Its dry - you can't be arsed.
The program you most want recorded doesn't.
The arse that nicks your office chair overnight always leaves you with the broken armed, dodgy wheel non- recliner.
The said chair rotates round the office on a weekly basis rather like "old maid".
Its then presented to "the new recruit"
You have no bin in the morning.
You push up, the office lift goes down.
You push down, the lift gets stuck.
You trace the loose wires to the emergency phone.
Your stapler needs staples when your in a rush.
There are no more staples.
You resort to hunting loose staples on the floor.
The stapler jams.
Your colleague stays late - when the boss is around.
The boss is away - people take extended breakfasts, lunch, then all leave early.
The hoover needs emptying when guests are due round.
The loo roll needs changing when its you in the loo.
The indoor arial works best in your hand - and standing on one foot.
Bin bags need emptying when you walk past them.
When they are they always split.
Its the wrong day/week/month for paper/plastic/glass recycling.
Young girls always stand safely on the pavement - while holding their pushchairs in the road.
Life's Like That - 2!
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Vanda
- Posts: 1389
- Joined: Wed Feb 12, 2003 7:02 pm
- Location: Nottinghamshire