The Future (maybe)

[GregT]

OFFICAL(ISH) GOVERNMENT PRESS RELEASE

FIRE SERVICE TO COVER FOR ARMY IN IRAQ

15TH APRIL 2003

In the face of industrial action by members of the armed forces, the government has announced that the FIRE SERVICE will, as a interim measure, carry out military operations in Iraq.

The army, who have demanded a 40% pay increase on the basis that their job has become rather more technical since 1945, will begin strike action next Thursday unless a compromise pay deal can be agreed in the meantime. It is understood that they will spend their time standing around little bonfires, rubbing their hands together and waving at passing vehicles who honk their horns at them.


Crack FIRE SERVICE personnel, highly trained in playing darts, brewing tea and sliding down poles are understood to be on standby to take front line operations. Using their “Red Goddessâ€

[Alex LS]

[Derek]

but also very true but you missed out that they were also highly trained at playing pool.

had to laugh at the firemen on the news and in the papers after that massive fire in edinburgh on saturday night ......

1. the army wouldn't have been able to tackle the fire as well as us and save as many buildings (the army aren't paid to put out fires, firemen are)

2. if the goverment cut back the number of firemen on duty at night (when they don't normally have many fires) then we wouldn't have been able to tackle the fire and control it so quickly. obviously modernisation in their eyes doesn't extend to being on stand by for serious fires and they forgot to mention 11 buildings were so badly damaged they will need to be demolished.