PLEASE HELP ME.....

nonsense and other stuff - Don't enter if easily offended !!!!!
Vanda
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Post by Vanda »

...... Im so not safe to be left on my own...... getting ready to go out. Just about to put some perfume on and there is the mother of all spiders just laughing at me sat on top of my perfume box, okay I dont mind going out without perfume but I do mind coming back to it being in my bed or something, if anyone wants to dispose of it whilst I'm out I'll leave a key under the bin.
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Vanda
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Post by Vanda »

Oh yeah I forgot, you're all watching footie aren't you....... no one to help a gal in distress :(

Well I've been dead brave! If anyone still wants to save me from it you will now find it trapped between the base of a can of deoderant and a CD, if no-one is offering to help maybe you could tell me how long it is before it dies?

Thanks!
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Lyndon
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Post by Lyndon »

brave vanda :thumbs: :thumbs: :thumbs: :thumbs: :thumbs:

it may take a few days to die :(, can you try and carry both the cd and can of deoderant plus trapped spider outside and er release it back into the wild ;) ??
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Vanda
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Post by Vanda »

Am a little concerned that even thought it's a big ba$tard it might just escape through the hole in the CD somehow and crawl up my arm, so until someone saves me or the bloody thing dies it's staying where it is!
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Lyndon
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Post by Lyndon »

i would do me 'knight in shining armour' routine but i've had a few cans of lager so not fit to drive sawery :oops:
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Vanda
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Post by Vanda »

No worries mate...... have had a few drinks myself so may well go and tackle it.........then again, it is VERY big :shock: , nahhh sod it, I'm going to bed instead.
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MattB
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Post by MattB »

Vanda, here's a bit of advice... pretend it's a bloke and show no mercy!!

PS it'll probably escape over night and attack you in bed anyway ;)

Vanda
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Post by Vanda »

I'm not having a major downer on blokes right now Matt or that would be good advice, and if I was pretending it was a bloke I wouldn't mind it escaping and attacking me whilst I was in bed!

As it is it's certainly a spider and it's still there, although it had managed to poke 2 legs under the deoderant can this morning.............. so there's now the original bottle of perfume balanced on top of can as well......gotta make sure it doesn't decide to use super human strength to escape.
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Vanda
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Post by Vanda »

IT'S STILL ALIVE - NOT AMUSED!
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TheMinel
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Post by TheMinel »

come on you sadistic witch!!!!! ;) ;) ;)
kill him or let him go! :shock: :shock: :shock:
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Vanda
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Post by Vanda »

Hey I did ask for help! I'm such a total wuss with spiders :(
Don't wanna be cruel but am just really rather pathetic!
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Robbie
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Post by Robbie »

My doggie loved to eat spiders and crane flies.

Unfortunately he died a year ago.

Sadly missed. :cry:

PS. Teddy says spiders live for weeks without eating and will squeeze out of the smallest spaces imaginable - he therefore suggests having to hand a bottle of JD and an old boot.

The JD to get the spider drunk before hitting it with the boot.

Robbie.

Derek
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Post by Derek »

is a crane fly a jenny long leg ? - i'm :? :lol:

when i was young, our dog (also sadly died) used to love eating them too - so handy seeing as i hated them :D
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Robbie
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Post by Robbie »

Er..a crane fly is commonly known as a "daddy long legs" down these parts...maybe yours underwent a sex change Derek.


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paul_y3k
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Post by paul_y3k »

come on you sadistic witch!!!!! ;) ;) ;)
kill him or let him go! :shock: :shock: :shock:
come on she's not evil .. mind you the other bits miht apply ;)
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