I do physical labour
I work at great depths
I plunge head first into everything i do
I do not get paid overtime
I do not get weekends or public holidays off
I work in a damp enviroment
I work in a dark workplace that has poor ventilation
I work in high temperatures and my work exposes me to contagious diseases
DEAR PENIS
AFTER ASSESSING YOUR REQUEST AND CONSIDERING THE ARGUMENTS YOU HAVE RAISED, THE ADMINISTRATION REJECTS YOuR REQUEST FOR THE FOLLOWING REASONS
YOU CAN NOT WORK 8 HOURS STRAIGHT
YOU FALL ASLEEP ON THE JOB AFTER BRIEF WORK PERIODS
YOU DO NOT ALWAYS FOLLOW THE ORDERS OF THE MANAGEMENT TEAM.
YOU DO NOT STAY IN YOUR DESIGNATED AREA AND ARE OFTEN SEEN VISITING OTHER LOCATIONS
yOU DO NOT TAKE THE INITIATIVE, YOU NEED TO BE PRESSURED AND STIMULATED IN ORDER TO START WORKING.
YOU LEAVE THE WORKPLACE RATHER MESSY AT THE END OF YOUR SHIFT
YOU DONT ALWAYS OBSERVE NECESSARY SAFETY REGULATIONS, SUCH AS WEARING THE CORRECT PROTECTIVE CLOTHING
YOU WILL RETIRE WELL BEFORE YOU ARE 65
YOU ARE UNABLE TO WORK DOUBLE SHIFTS
YOU SOMETIMES LEAVE YOUR DESIGNATED WORK BEFORE YOU HAVE COMPLETED THE ASSIGNED TASK
AND IF ALL THE ABOVE WERE NOT BAD ENOUGH, YOU HAVE BEEN SEEN CONSTANTLY ENTERING AND EXITING THE WORKPLACE CARRYING TWO SUSPICIOUS LOOKING BAGS
SINCERELY
THE MANAGEMENT