Lack of Posting!

[RTF]

(or shouldn't i be... )

[Robbie]

Late one night under the starry sky, the lone ranger and tanto are sitting by the camp fire. The Lone Ranger points to a spot on the ground and says "bug".

Tanto looks up and nods. "Ladybug" says the Lone Ranger.

Tanto looks up again— "Good eye".

[Mr_AWOL]

Nooooh!

Not allowed to drink at lunchtime I could get breathalised when I come back to work and be sacked for it. I'm not joking either. The industry I work in has a no drinking policy and that includes going overboard with the booze the night before aswell!!

Burge

Well gald my boosses cant do thsat coz i am gonna be even by the time i GET TO WORK tomorow morning!

still, it's my birthday & i'll get if i wantr to eh?

Not on topic at all, but seeing as you lot are telling jokes, i have possibkly the bestest jokes of all time:

Knock Knock
(Whos there?)
An Interupting Cow
(an Interuptibng co................)
MOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO

LMFAO!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

[CB]

Nope...I have the best joke ever...:


Whats E.T. short for?


























Cus he's got little legs....

[Mr_AWOL]

oh b*ll**ks CB - i will NEVER be aBLE to remebmbner that tomorrow!

stuill, a quality joke none the less!

[Burge]

Adrian,

My hubby and Rob work for the same company. Are you going to Thorpe Park in June? If so hope to see you and William there. I'm still not into big rides (The horse is exciting enough for me and although scary at times she is reasonably close to the ground!) but will enjoy watching other bab themselves!!!

Burge

[Adrian]

Well at least I was half right, we both work on the railways, obviously I dont listen to anything Rob says.
William and I hope to go to Thorpe Park, havent checked if we are free yet.

[CB]

OK...heres my Lone Ranger joke:





After a hard day on the trail, the Lone Ranger and Tonto his Red Indian friend ride into town and tie their horses up outside the nearest saloon. They go inside for some liquid refreshment.

After a short while a cowboy enters the saloon, "Hey, who owns the horses outside"?

"I do", says the Lone Ranger...

"Well, they're looking kind of faint pardner", says the cowboy.

The Lone Ranger and Tonto go outside the saloon and see the cowboy is right, the horses don't look well at all. The Lone Ranger tells Tonto to start sprinting in circles around them in order to create a cooling breeze. The little Red Indian does as he is told and the Lone Ranger goes back inside the saloon to finish his drink.

An hour or so later another cowboy enters the saloon..."Hey, who owns the horses outside"?

"I do whats the problem now"? asks the Lone Ranger...

"You left your Injun running" replies the cowboy...

[CB]

A teacher cautiously approaches the subject of sex education with her Grade Two class because she realizes Little Johnny's habit of using sexual innuendo is going to cause some trouble.

Johnny remains attentive throughout the whole class and, finally, the teacher asks for examples of sex education from the class.

One little boy raises his hand, 'I saw a bird in her nest with some eggs.'

`Very good, William,' said the teacher.

'My mummy had a baby,' said little Esther.

'Oh, that's nice,' replied the teacher.

Finally, Little Johnny raises his hand. With much fear and trepidation, the teacher calls on him. 'I was watching TV yesterday and I saw the Lone Ranger. He was surrounded by hundreds and hundreds of Indians. And they all attacked at one time. And he killed every one of them with his two guns.'

The teacher was relieved but puzzled, 'And what does that have to do with sex education, Johnny?'

'It'll teach those Indians not to f*** with the Lone Ranger.'

[Burge]

Just recieved this as a text message:

"Millionaire cheat Major Ingram has committed suicide. ITV will pay for the funeral but not the COFFIN..........!!!!!

Burge